File this one under “I KNEW IT!!”

I am not a huge fan of reality TV shows and I've long thought they were completely staged.  Recently, I ran across an article titled, "13 Secrets a Reality TV Show Producer Won't Tell You."  Well, they must have told someone, 'cause someone wrote an article about it...You may want to stop reading if you don't want to know...I'm gonna spill it!  

----Reality TV is actually not, well...real.  It's true that there is no script, but there ARE writers who craft plot-lines, twisting and tweaking footage to create conflict and shape a story.  OH, and they redo things ALL the time.  On 'Biggest Loser', the contestants have to walk up to the scale about five times so the producer can capture all the angles on camera.

----They always try to get as much talent as possible without spending much money.  99% of the "stars" get their expenses covered and collect a small, daily stipend of $20-$30 or so.

----Yes, they actually DO take different clips and edit them together to sound like one conversation.  This sometimes drastically changes the meaning.  They even create complete sentences from scratch.  Apparently, it's so common, it's got a name: FRANKENBITING.  If you see someone talking and then the camera cuts away to a shot of something else but you still hear their voice, that's likely 'frankenbiting'.  

----In most competition shows, a clause in the contract states that producer, NOT the judges (or the voters, for that matter), has the final say in who's eliminated.  Oh, the judges make the picks, but the producers can veto and claim that a person is "good for the show" and keep them.

----Compelled to redo your bathroom in a day after watching a DIY-er do it?  Not so fast...it may look like it took only 24 hours, but they actually had a professional crew working it for two weeks and the budget was completely unrealistic.

----Want to apply for a reality show?  Hi-light your weaknesses.  Talk about your fear of spiders or that you hate lawyers and salesmen.  Producers LOVE that stuff.

----Any time they have an "All-Star" version of a show, the players are almost always on the phone with each other beforehand, making deals.  Most of the 'stars' are so shady, though, they usually end up breaking their alliances before the game even starts.

----The big shows do extensive background checking on all prospective stars.  They call friends and family, conduct drug and STD testing, make them sit through endless interviews, and do psychological and physical examinations.

----Some reality shows are HEAVILY staged.  For example, "House Hunters" has reportedly toured homes that weren't even on the market, like a friends' home.  In some of the "day-in-the-life" shows about different occupations, many producers fake scenarios (like a tree falling on a logger) to add drama.

----The players are coached to be a certain way.  A really nice woman on one show was hired to play a villain and was told that if she wanted to make more money and come back the next season, she'd have to ramp it up.  Apparently, she did.

----The on-camera interviews are especially produced and coached.  It's easy to 'nudge' them to think a certain way or tell them something that will change their tune.

----The location of a show determines the budget.  To save money, some have even shot scenes in their own homes.

----We only see a sliver of the action in the 42-minutes episode we see.  Most of these shows have dozens of cameras running for hours, which provides the endless material they can use to "frankenbite" a whole show.

Personally, I say we vote "reality" shows off the planet.  C'mon...press '1' for yes...'2' for no...your vote matters.  Seriously.