Sunday, September 22, 2013

I’ve run away to join a DIFFERENT circus…

Best “Out of the Office” Auto-reply email messages:
I am currently out of the office at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position....Please be prepared for my mood.

You are receiving this automatic notification, because I am out of the office.  If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.

I will be unable to delete all the emails you send me until I return from vacation.  Please be patient, and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.

The email server is unable to verify your server connection.  Your message has not been delivered.  Please restart your computer and try sending again.  (The beauty of this is that when you return, you can see who did this over and over and over....)

I will be out of the office for the next two weeks for medical reasons.  When I return, please refer to me as 'Lucille' instead of Steve.

Foreign “English” phrases:

Doctor's office in Rome: SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.

Information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner, Japan:  COOLES AND HEATES: IF YOU WANT CONDITION OF WARM AIR IN YOUR ROOM, PLEASE CONTROL YOURSELF.

In Aamchi Mumbai restaurant:  OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, AND WEEKENDS TOO.

Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:  WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?

In a Japanese cemetery:  PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES.

Woops!

In 1980, the Yellow Pages accidentally listed a Texas funeral home under
frozen foods.

A Saudi Arabian woman can get a divorce if her husband doesn't give her
coffee. (This one seems reasonable)


When Bugs Bunny first appeared in 1935, he was called Happy Rabbit.

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