Now I understand why some animals eat their young...

It's the duty of young people to make bad choices. It's the duty of people our age to mock them.  It is so much fun to embarrass teenagers.  Especially if they are not my own, but Emmy is a good sport.  She and I often run errands together and my favorite thing is driving with the windows down on a warm day, blaring an “old” song that isn’t cool, and “chair dancing” while she tries to hide her face.  Something like “It’s Rainin’ Men” or anything by Def Leppard or the Scorpions.  She thinks I’m weird. 

Well, I think SHE’S weird, so THERE!  I love it when she misunderstands the definition of a word.  She once asked me what a “peeve” was.  I wasn’t sure what she was talking about at first, so I asked her to elaborate.  She said, “It’s a type of pet.”  Priceless. 

Trying to explain things to her from my era or before is getting to be more and more difficult.  “Mom, what’s a juke box?” “Ummm…..it’s like an 800-pound iPod… without the headphones.”  My favorite is the fact that I get to tell my grandson that I’m older than the internet.  He’ll be AMAZED!  That, or he’ll pity me.  “Poor Gummy….so old.”  He’s almost three and successfully closing the garage door brings a round of applause, so for now, I’m cool I guess.

Em and I share a similar sense of humor.  Recently, Em had a bloody nose and some of it hit the carpet.  We went to Wal-Mart to find some carpet cleaner that might get it out. Standing in the aisle, completely oblivious to whoever was around, I said, "Don't they have anything that will get blood out of carpet?" Just then I notice a woman glance at me, so I added, "...and don't let me forget garbage bags."  

I spend a lot of time mocking how my daughter and her friends talk.  I get like so much like enjoyment out of it, ya know?  I would have thought the "Valley Girl" vibe died out YEARS ago.  Like.  I’m starting to think my family’s “Coat of Arms” ties at the back…. ‘Course, there’s nothing wrong with teenagers that 30 years won’t fix.