This holiday
season, being ‘on break’ from school between terms and not having to work
at the moment, I have been able to spend more time with my sister, accompanying
her while we run errands, have lunch and dash about doing our Christmas
shopping. It has been quite entertaining, as you can imagine, with all
the hustle and bustle of extra people out doing the very same thing.
I don’t
regularly shop for clothing for myself, so styles come and go and I’m perfectly
happy to wear what I’ve got in my closet. I noticed, however, a trend in
many of the clothing stores we visited: neon and stripes are HUGE,
apparently. Browsing in the plus-size stores and departments, I also
noticed that styles have gone quite splashy – lots of glitter, sequins, big
flowers and lots of ‘poofy’. OK, I get dressing classy
for your weight – it’s possible – but neon and glitter? Really? And
who’s making the decisions on sizing? It seems the larger the size, the
bigger the arms and sleeves. Some of those blouses had wings! And
whose bright idea was it to gather the waistline of each and every top?
The LAST thing I want to do is draw attention to my li’l muffin top. OK,
maybe mine is more like a busted can of biscuits, but still…drawing the waist
in just gives us a nice pocket to store our ‘tires’ in!
I must say, the
people-watching was great. The other day we were wandering around
Wal-Mart and overheard a conversation between two guys – one of whom was an
employee of the store, as indicated by his vest. He was talking with
another guy who very closely resembled the Mucinex monster. The employee
said, “I thought you were working today?” Mr. Sickie said, “No, I called
in sick today.” and then promptly started fishing through a nearby bin of
movies, while openly coughing all over them. Who calls in sick to their
place of work and then goes shopping AT THAT STORE?!?
My favorite
one, though, HAD to be the cashier at Dick’s Sporting Goods. I made a
joke about tomorrow being the end of the world and she shot me a look and
announced, “You know, I’m really depressed about that because I’m just not sure
if it’s true or not.” I couldn't help looking surprised, but
she noticed the disbelief on my face before I could gather my wits and followed
that up with, “Don’t make fun of me – I've seen a lot of convincing
evidence!” Yet she still asked if we’d like a gift receipt. You
mean for the 26th? I’d say the number of people shopping is a pretty big
indication that no one actually believes that tomorrow is the end of all
things.
I, for one, do
not buy the whole doomsday baloney. I tend to put my faith in scripture,
which tells us that no man knows the day or the hour. That’s good enough
for me. It still doesn't prevent me from coming up with
creative ways to mess with people. You know, like putting an outfit on my
front lawn on days when someone predicts doomsday. If
it wasn't pouring down rain, I would SO do that! I don’t keep
things I don’t wear, so I don’t have the “spare” clothing to ruin in that manner.
Enjoy the
holidays everyone! Pretty sure we’ll all still be here to use our gift
receipts!
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