Sunday, September 22, 2013

I'm telling!

I am the oldest of three – I have one brother and one sister.  I was a brat.  My sister, Kami, is four years younger than I am and she generally caught the brunt of my childish orneriness and jealousies.  It’s amazing I ever grew out of that and consider her my best friend today.  Well, actually I’m amazed that she never held my transgressions against me.  She got back at me though.  Mom liked for us to keep our room clean and she didn’t particularly like it if we drew on the windows when they fogged up.  Since Kam and I always shared a room, she would draw a picture on the window, sign my name, and then tell on me.  And Mom fell for it!  I deserved it, though.  I cut her doll’s hair off, I tried to give her away and once I convinced her to run away.  I was mean. 

My antics weren’t limited to my sister.  I was a tough kid to raise.  I bucked the system at every turn.  I am what you would call “strong-willed”.  That’s a nice way to say I was a rotten teenager.  I do things my way, consequences be darned.  Of course, I’ve learned to control it and direct it but when I was a kid, I never just simply did what I was told.  And I was well into my 30’s before I finally figured it out.  Oh, and you know that “Mother’s Curse”?  You know the one – “I hope you have a child JUST LIKE YOU!”  Well…it works.  I have a daughter just like me:  strong-willed and “I’ll-do-it-my-way”.  But I get to pass on the “revenge”, if you will:  I wished a child just like her on her too.  It worked….again.  When she was growing up, I would call up my Mom and lament, “I’m so sorry for the rotten kid that I was…..now how do I fix her?”  She would laugh and bestow her great wisdom on me.  It always sounded so easy and I would get off the phone with renewed resolve to get through to my mini-me.  To this day, I rely on her wisdom to help me with my girls…when I can pocket my strong will and call her!

I think being a rotten kid has given me a unique perspective on things.  I didn’t STAY a brat.  Well…..not really, anyway.  I do ornery things from time to time, but I’m not being mean – just silly.  OK, so I’m mean, but it’s just my strong will showing…I swear. 

When I was a kid and didn’t want to do the dishes with my sister, I would “excuse myself to go to the bathroom” and stay gone JUUUUST long enough for most of the work to be done by the time I got back.  They caught on to that one, though.  I also didn’t take very good care when it was my turn to do dishes alone and silverware mysteriously disappeared.  Recently, my Dad teasingly asked me, “So, now that you’re an adult, tell me:  Did you intentionally throw away the silverware when you were a kid?”  I laugh nervously…

In Kindergarten, I got sent to the corner a LOT.  Apparently, I was rather mouthy to poor old Miss Beckwith.  I remember the bulletin board with the construction paper border, slowly tearing it into tiny little pieces as I stood with my nose in the corner.  When I was “released”, I left a carpet of confetti in defiance behind me.  I remember, as I progressed through elementary school, it didn’t get much better.  Remember “Study Carrels”?  I think they’re regarded as “cruel and unusual punishment” now. 

It’s funny the things we do as kids and then confess to our parents years later, knowing that the “statute of limitations” has passed.  For example, my brother and I used to play inside the newly constructed, empty homes being built a few neighborhoods away.  We never destroyed anything, but we would pretend that we lived there and hang out all day.  You know, back when kids could be gone all day and no one issued and Amber Alert.  Once, we hid in a closet under the stairs when a real estate agent came by with a client.  After that, the house was locked up, but we felt kind of like the vonTrapp family hiding behind a pillar in the church yard when the police were looking for them.  It was exhilarating!


I’m glad I learned how to control my strong will.  It’s too bad it took me 30 plus years to figure it out.  OK, 40 plus…

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